Swali imeishi kuwa, Bangi huchizisha?
Tactile hallucinations – a perception of having seen, heard, touched, tasted or smelled something that wasn’t actually there…Remember that for later.
Growing up, nilipenda kusoma both for class na novels, with time this changed nikakuwa fascinated na obsessed with books and whatever they may hold. Watimo ameniona through this na sometimes hubrag kwa wenzake venye sijawai acha kusoma ata after “kumaliza” shule. During my 5yr+ stay in Moi Uni i had managed to acquire quite a large collection of books. Siku nlirudi kejani Watimo aliexpect nikuwe na vitu mingi since aliwa ametuma a lumpsum za kunibebeshea mzigo but to her surprise, kijana amebeba tu nguo na suitcase mbili kubwa zimejaana vitabu.
“aiii! wewe na hizi vitabu zako. Kwanza unazitoanga wapi?” before nirealize haikuwa rhetoric aliwa ashaondokea.
Of late kila time tukiwa pamoja kwa nyumba ananiona tu nikisoma and i happened to tell her the number of books, ###, i want to read by end year. Sunday moja aliekea church akaniacha nikijivinjari na “Love in Time of Cholera” by Gabriel Marquez akitoka ibada bado nliwa in the same spot but sasa kitabu nimefika past nusu.
“Guthoma mūno ti kwega. Muthenya ūmwe buku nīigakūgūrūkia na nīrīo ūgetīkia!” This was said with confidence and conviction, i’m sure i also heard a hint of adoration in the statement.
“At least hutasema ni bangi imenichizisha.” Thanks to god ile blunt nliwai 420 seconds ago iliwa imeshuka kiasi na sikujibu vile out loud.
ENTER TOPIC: KUCHIZI
Sasa ndo tunaenda part ya Tactile Hallucinations.
i love wee and have dedicated the little i have to worshipping it. Nliianza kitambo and i can’t remember how my first time felt but every puff has been newer to my sensations and fulfilling to the self than the last.
Being a psychologist nimeona my fair share of mental illness cases, one of these being Drug Induced Psychosis. In layman’s terms, DIP is is caused by excessive consumption or sudden withdrawal from consumption of a chemical substance by an individual dependent on the drug. Marijuana can cause DIP, consolation is Alcohol causes more cases of than our beloved and oftenly misunderstood Mary Jane. DIP is differentiated from other types of psychosis by tactile hallucinations.
From my interaction with addicts i have started developing a fear for wee.
Mara mob najipatanga nikijiambia,
“Maybe my next puff ndo itanichizisha.
ENTER ANSWER: Bangi inaweza chizisha.
Siku fulani nikakosa plug wangu…for the 2yrs tumeshughulikiana na uyu jamaa i rarely not find him na nikimkosa huwa napata P.A wake. Iyo siku ata P.A hakuwa ikabidi nisake peddi mwingine.
(in a stoner’s world, plugs are demigods.)
Tirre nliwai no problem, they even were thicker kuliko nlizozoea. Mbio hadi chwom nikawai half-life. With these hard times you have to be economical with your blunts. Nikaiwasha, lungs exhale all the filth and bullshit, deep puff till the said lungs are filled with bliss laced with smoke, admire the blunt as i take in a new reality — this is a ritual.
“ii time yote mbona sijaijua jina ya Plug?
Maybe ni ju hatujai interact beyond biashara. But mostly ni ju i don’t give a toot about names.” All that thought but,
“Who cares? Borake nipate nitakacho,” said out loud to no one.
A few hours later, the dark of night has set in na nimepatana na my fellow worshipers of wee. After kuchocha stori kadhaa tukaamua kuingia kichorochoro kuwai sesh. The initial plan was to walk till the roll of wee depleted but ii iliwa inatake longer than expected tukaonelea tusimame tu pahali moja.
(Remember tactile hallucinations?!)
It was not long before tulianza kudai venye ile mali ilishika kuliko ya kawaida.
“Tunafaa kuanzana na uyo plug umecheki Leo…” one of the guys was suggesting alafu nikaanza kufeel tuvitu tukinipandilia kwa miguu…tactile hallucinations, maybe. After kuwauliza, my two companions hawakudhani ni siafu na after kumulika tuliposimama tuliconfirm ni ukweli.
At this point i was convinced this is the day i had long expected but hoped it would never came to be. Wee had rendered me psychotic.
The blunt still had lots of life na nilipofikiwa na chain my hands grew heavy. A question popped in my head, “uko sure utawai bado?” My worsening tactile hallucinations and budding anxiety coerced me to pass it on without a puff. We’re it a normal day, my brain would have been guilt laden due to my generous act badala yake nliwa napanga kenye ntafanya if ningechizi. Blank. Fear. Anxiety. More tactile senstations.
Kuona nimeanza kuwa uneasy na ile sesh, the once in a lifetime chance, wale maninja wadai tuanze kurudi makejani. Tukatokea kwa magiza zimenice na kuanza katafuta kangumuu tusort munchies. After getting to the shop i decided to check the source of my hallucinations, my leg — my faithful servants that had delivered me to all my plugs and anyone else that gave me wee.
“Maninja ka si siafu zinanikula mjue ni tirre ndo zimeanza kunichizisha!” The guys were laughing nlipoanza kufungua mshipi naye shopkeeper akaanza kuchungulia nini inaendelea, huyu hajaikosa kiherehere. Trousers sasa zimefika on my nonexistent hips nimezishikilia na mkono moja huku inginie iko kwa magoti ikitafuta kiniumacho.
It is hard to feel anything against my hairy legs. i wish i shaved more often. i feel it now, not yet. There. Relief.
My ring finger now lies on the source of all my misery, kasiafu. i have to be careful nisiitoe niache kichwa. With the two fingers that had previously passed the wee, nikaing’oa.
Showings the ant to the guys and the same time struggling to lift my trousers back in position i said,
“Siku ya kuchizi ka iko si Leo!”
Think about belts, they hold up trousers. The trousers inturn have buckles to hold up belts. To what end?!
ENTERS FACT: Bangi haijakuchizisha, bado.
Nimemaliza kufungulia Siz gate aelekee soko alafu nkanotice commotion, rendered ya vijanaa inatembe huku imemfunga mmoja wao mguu kwa kamba kama kondoo. Pamoja na Siz na mumewe tukaanza kuspeculate nini inaendelea.
“Anaweza kuwa mwizi wameshika,” goes the inlaw.
“Ama ametokwa na wazimu wana…” ata before sijamaliza the sibling ashaanza,
“huyo inaweza kuwa ni bangi yenye mnavuta imemchizisha. Mtaenda kupatana na yeye rehab, Timo.”
ENTERS QUESTION : Bangi itanichizisha?